don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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