We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
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