i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
This is like the time you took a picture of your knees and told him it was your tits, isn't it?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
You know your life has gone downhill when someone has to preface your night with "don't get locked in a porta potty"
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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