Umm I'm too high to move.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Things he has used as lube on me: olive oil, cologne, purell, spit, tanning oil, and bottled hotel lotion
He needs to save up for some actual ky before my vagina gets an allergic reaction
Did you just see the Batmobile???
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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