Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
