remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I know her cup size but not her name....
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
