i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Randomize
