Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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