Hey theres a creepy ass guy stalking our house.i would look alive geting in 2nite.
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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