So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
