found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
tell me about the fingering
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize