i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
