so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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