so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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