i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
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