This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I have demons in me.
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
