Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Randomize
