Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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