Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
