So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Randomize
