Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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