I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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