hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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