he asked me what things i liked that he did in bed, and i told him all the things i hated so he would use it on that new bitch and she wouldnt hook up with him anymore.
you for real need to get over him dude
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
Randomize
