You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
I'm just crazy horny about you
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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