He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I told him I'd put in a good word. And the word of the day is: NEGATIVE
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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