we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
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