I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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