Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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