I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
It all started with a game of naked twister.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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