Pregnant stripper...not hot.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Church boner. Awkwardddd
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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