I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I looked at you and you stared at me dead in the eyes then sprayed febreze at your crotch and winked.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
