There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
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