Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever

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(901): View more from Tennessee

I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"

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(917): View more from New York City

The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...

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(909): View more from California

When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?

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(355): View more from

He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat

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(443): View more from Maryland

What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?

(1-443): View more from Maryland

The pinata full of drugs?

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(919): View more from North Carolina

How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?

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(304): View more from West Virginia

I totally fucked your pastor last night.

(1-304): View more from West Virginia

You're his wife.

(304): View more from West Virginia

Still a dirty get down.

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