i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
Randomize
