You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
I am naked and annoyed.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
Randomize
