lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
