I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Howd last night go?
well he stumbled in my parents door drunk and then asked my mom if she was my grandma. Id say as far as first impressions go, he failed miserably
Randomize