i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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