is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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