How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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