She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
Randomize