11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
