How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Randomize