I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
third nipple confirmed
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
