Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
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