He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
