i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
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