Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
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