how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
