White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
so let's talk penis.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
We don't watch enough power rangers
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Randomize
